Seasonal greetings 2011 (Brick Walls) (General)

by m p griffiths , Friday, December 23, 2011, 11:48 (4722 days ago) @ Lincolnian

Time to roll out this, (for those who haven't come across this before) which is so true....

It is New Year's Eve, 1852, and John Smith sits at his desk by candlelight. He dips his quill pen and begins to write his New Year's Resolutions

New Year Resolutions

No man is truly well-educated unless he learns to spell his name at least three different ways within the same document. I resolve to give the appearance of being well-educated in the coming year.

I resolve to see to it that all my children will have the same names that my ancestors used for 6 generations in a row.

My age is no one's business but my own. I hereby resolve never to list the same age or birth year on any document.

I resolve to have all my children baptised in a different church, either in a different faith or in a different parish. Every third child will not be baptised at all or will be baptised by an itinerant minister who keeps no records.

I resolve to move to a new town, new County, at least once very ten years - just before those pesky enumerators come around asking silly questions.

I will attempt to reside in counties and towns where no vital records are maintained, or where the courthouse burns down every few years.

I resolve to join an obscure cult that does not believe in record keeping.

When the tax collector comes to my door, I resolve to loan him my pen which has been dipped in rapidly fading blue ink.

I resolve that if my beloved wife Mary should die, I will marry another Mary.

I resolve not to make a will. Who needs to spend money on a lawyer?

I resolve not to clutter up the good farm pastures with headstones that will just get broken or fade with time anyway.

I resolve to protect my family and friends privacy by giving false names and places for events.

I resolve never to give the correct accounts of misdeeds in the family, so when Uncle Len who shot that guy - was tried for murder, my kids will be told he stole a cow.

I resolve never to trim the family cemetery of brush and tangled weeds, to keep out anyone doing that silly Genealogical work.

I resolve to always alternate my kids and wife's first and middle names, when the census taker comes round, just to give him practice with his spelling.

I resolve to come from Ireland, where there are no records, or if they are they can only be examined by visiting the exact village, pleading with the local clergy (who is hostile to anyone not of his belief which of course you are) and or handing over a fee equal to or exceeding your yearly income, for one hours research which may not reveal anything.

I resolve that not only will I NOT die in my country of birth, but nor shall my children (yea verily) unto the 6th generation.

I resolve that I will call my children by odd names which the enumerator shall spell incorrectly.

I resolve that I will be absent on the night of the census.

I resolve that if unable to be absent on census night, I shall endeavour to be enumerated twice.

I resolve that when I die my children/wife are instructed to give the wrong details for my death certificate.

I resolve that I and most of my family shall die suddenly just before death certification is brought in, in a parish where easy access to the parish records ceases the previous year.

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Happy hunting , Merry Christmas and all the best for 2012